It's that time of year again. All the leaves are turning color & falling. Our days are cooler, for the most part, & shorter. Halloween is right around the corner. Time for apple festivals, hay rack rides, & cider. My favorite time of year!! It's also pumpkin carving time! Today, I want to share a little prayer with you. One you can do with your children, a tradition you could start, while carving pumpkins.
I had never heard of this prayer but a friend shared it with me and I want to do the same. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Now I'm really looking forward to carving ours & roasting seeds this year!!
A Christian Pumpkin
Lord, open my mind so that I can learn new things about you. (cut the top of the pumpkin)
Remove the things in my life that don't please you. (scoop out the insides)
Forgive the wrong things I do and help me to forgive others. (can talk about taking the "junk" and making something good from it -pie, roasted seeds, whatever you do w/ the insides of your pumpkins - or do nothing with this line)
Open my eyes to see the beauty you've made in the world around me. (carve the eyes)
I'm sorry for the times I've turned my nose up at the good food you provide. (carve the nose)
Let everything I say please You. (carve the mouth)
Lord, help me show your light to others through the things I do. (light the pumpkin)
Amen
I did not write this prayer. I am only sharing it for educational purposes. Enjoy!!
The year anniversary is approaching of our girls' baptisms. It's amazing how far we've come over the past year and a half. However, our RCIA classes came to an end shortly after Easter and it didn't take long for us to fall back into the same old rut we were in before. Too busy for this and too busy for that.
I haven't spent any quite time alone with God in months and I know it's affecting me. Of course, God is still there nudging me along. Just a few days ago, I got a e-mail from our niece saying she has met a wonderful guy, a Catholic beau, who is very faith and family oriented. Since being involved with him, she has started attending mass with her children. She enrolled her daughter in the PSR program and she is starting the RCIA program. This is wonderful news! She deserves nothing but the best.
Our niece went on to say, that whether we knew it or not, she really looks up to my husband and I. Wow! That's one of the nicest things we could ever hear. I could barely finish the letter because I was crying and I could not read it to my husband, who was just as touched.
Knowing that we were her role models wasn't the only thing that moved me to tears. It was knowing that God was using her to speak to me. I've fallen out of my relationship with Him. The one I was working so hard to build one short year ago.
And again yesterday, he used one of my blog sites to get the message through. I'll leave you with their message. Does it hit home for you as well?
It has been said, "If the devil cannot make you bad, he'll make you busy."
Am I a good parent? Hell, I don't know, go ask my kids. They'll probably tell you I'm a good mom when we're doing "fun" stuff & a bad mom when they're in trouble. Yeah, that's like 25% of the day, if I'm lucky. At least I think that's what they'd say. During fun times I always get the "Mom, you are the best mom ever!" & discipline times "I hate you, I want to go live with another mom!" OK, so my oldest says it anyway. My middle DD is still too self centered to think about complimenting anyone & the baby, well duh, she doesn't talk. But those are the heart melting OR heart breaking times in parenting were you know if you are thriving or failing......
Yes, I really did say my oldest tells me she hates me. And yes, I really did say she would like to move in with a new mom. This takes place at bedtime. Usually when she's over tired & fighting sleep. This child has never been a sleeper. Trust me, she didn't get that from me......I always reply with a I love you & I'm sorry you feel that way. I even offer to help pack her bags & let her know how much she'll be missed. She usually tells me she can't drive yet & wonders how she'll get there. I offer to drive her or drop her off at a bus stop. She doesn't like that very much. Well kiddo, neither do I. It breaks my heart when you say it.
Yes, I really did say my middle DD was self centered. It's proven that until a certain age, kids don't relate to anyone's feeling but their own. All they know is what they want, when they want it. At least that's what I read. And I guess that's a good thing. It's survival mode. If it wasn't all about me at this age, how would they make it? Bad thing is, she's going through the I'm gonna cry about everything phase:
You didn't take me to the bathroom 2 seconds after I asked.
You aren't pushing me high enough on the swing.
You are pushing me too high on the swing.
Sissy took my toy.
Baby pulled my hair.
Someone is touching MY pillow. (FYI, this is a body pillow, about 3 times her size that she carries everywhere, OK not out of the house, but still)
Good thing she's my lover. Good thing she has the tiniest little voice that melts my heart in a instant.
And yes, my baby is still just a baby. Self centered & stubborn w/massive stranger anxiety. She'll flirt with you, but don't touch her. Somedays, don't look at her. She's a teething, pudgy ball of a mess right now. She's a peanut butter, popcorn & banana loving little princess. Afraid of the grass but loves the outdoors. A dirt eater like her 13.5 mo older sibling. And her smile, can't forget that. It's a half crooked, 4 teeth on top, pirate grin!
Yes, there are so many times I question my parenting but I love my girls!!
What feeds your soul? What is your calling? What lights you up more than anything? If you had unlimited resources, what would you be doing with your life? Over the last few months, everywhere I turn, these questions keep popping up. Now, it's quite the coincidence since I've been praying to God to help me find my calling. Or is it? Have I been failing to see & hear all these TV shows, radio programs, blog posts, & news articles? Is this the hot topic of the month? OR is God speaking to me through these outlets? Obviously, as we've all heard many times, God is not going to pick up the phone & call me. I'm not going to answer the phone to Him saying, Hello Karla, this is God, you were created to......No, that won't happen, but I will eventually find my calling.....
Did anyone see Oprah's farewell show? I haven't seen her show in years & that's not because I dislike Oprah. I actually love her show. I think she is so inspirational. She has taken her show, her power, her wealth, her knowledge & used it to help countless others. It just so happens that I caught her finale. What an amazing ending to this chapter in her life!! If you missed it, you can view a few of the clips & a typed version on her website. I have to say it is a must read. Her words were beautiful & moving. Oprah gets it. She has listened to God & used her calling to serve....Her show will be missed & I can't wait to see where she goes from here.
Quotes that spoke to me during her show:
"You are responsible for your life. You are responsible for the energy that you create for yourself, and you're responsible for the energy that you bring to others."
"All life is energy and we are transmitting it at every moment. We are all beaming little signals like radio frequencies, and the world is responding in kind."
"Everybody has a calling, and your real job in life is to figure out what that is and get about the business of doing it. You have to know what sparks the light in you so that you, in your own way, can illuminate the world."
"I learned from the guests on this show, no need to feel superior to anybody. Because, whether it's heroin addiction or gambling addiction or shopping addiction or food addiction, work addiction, the root is all the same---unworthiness---not feeling worthy enough to own the life you were created for---this show has taught me you're worthy because you are born and because you are here. Your being here, your being alive, makes worthiness your birthright. You alone are enough."
"I've talked to nearly 30,000 people---all had one thing in common: They all wanted validation---They want to know Do you see me? Do you hear me? Does what I say mean anything to you?---Try it with your children, your husband, your wife, your boss, your friends. Validate them. I see you. I hear you. And what you say matters to me."
"I know I've never been alone, and you haven't either. And I know that that presence, that flow--some people call it grace--is working in my life at every single turn. And yours too, if you let it in. It's closer than your breath, and it is yours for the asking."
"Connect. Embrace. Liberate. Love somebody. Just one person. And then spread that to two. And as many as you can. You'll see the difference it makes."
"I understand the manifestation of grace and God, so I know there are no coincidences. There are none. Only divine order here."
-Oprah
Today's song is one that I have just recently found. I have fallen in love with the words & I feel it fits perfectly for today's topic....your calling....
I've been working on reading the same book for a month or so now. While I find the book interesting & an easy read, I just keep putting it on the back burner. I've read a few other books in the mean time & I've spent plenty of time playing on the WWW. I know why I keep putting it off. Which is funny, really, since it's exactly what I've been asking for. A closer relationship with God. I'm finding my answer involves giving up things & I'm just like the next person, I don't wanna give up anything. Human desires, well, they suck.....
Last night I needed something to do. The girls were in bed, asleep, without me, my hubby was on the computer (so that was out), & we just cancelled our Dish (so no TV upstairs). I browsed good ole Facebook, on my phone, for a few & then decided to pick up the book & read a few chapters. These chapters talked about growing your relationship with God & who you have always identified yourself to be. Things I have been praying about for weeks. Coincidence? I think not.....
So who do I define myself as? Well if I had never met you, I'd tell you I was Karla, mother to 3 beautiful little girls & wife to my amazing husband of 6 years. I am Karla, a stay at home mom. Which I'd then feel a little less than "awesome" about & I'd probably end there, while getting lost in my own thoughts. Thoughts about who I used to be. An assistant manager. I might even feel like I should tell you this just to make myself sound just a little bit more important & interesting. After all, how important & interesting does staying at home sound? It's not some prestigious job out in the workforce.
I know staying at home with my girls IS an important job. I just fail to realize it on so many occasions. Last night, however, I was enlightened to a new way of thinking. I am not defined by any of these realities. I like how the author put it, "Like many women, I'd struggled with a flawed perception of myself. My sense of identity & worth were dependent on the wrong things."
My real reality is......this is just a moment in time. I'll blink my eyes & it will be over. One day, I will meet new people & I will define myself as Karla, mother to 3 beautiful women, grandmother (should I be so blessed) to xxx number of grandkids, wife to amazing husband of xxx years & who knows what line of work I'll say I do. BUT the one thing that will not change is.....I am a child of God & I can't feel truly fulfilled till I listen to Him. I can't wait till I decide to quit being so scared & give myself over completely.
Today is day 9, I believe, of my "song posts". I'm sure you'll see why I chose this song....& BTW, the book I'm reading is called "Made to Crave" by Lysa TerKeurst. You can find more out about it HERE.
